I cannot believe how much it has been raining today. I've been awake since 6AM and the rain started when I went to sleep. Its still raining.
I'm from Florida so this doesn't bother me much. I'm used to shitty weather, but for the fact of the matter is that I'm on vacation and this is definitely not vacation weather. Thank God, there was nothing planned for today, cause it would have been completely ruined. I just hope that the rain disappears before I head to the airport to leave. Today is my last day of vacation.
These past two weeks I have been spending my time with my family back in Puerto Rico. Ever since my surgeries I've been wanting to come and visit. The only family I have here in Florida are: my sister, my mom, and my dad. My grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins are all in Puerto Rico and don't plan on moving away. Even my brother is back at my grandma's place. Going through what I'm going through is pretty hard sometimes, especially when majority of your family can only show their support from afar. I wanted to see them. Needed to see them.
My aunt is the only one that had the money and time to come to Florida and see me. She and my mother tried to keep it a secret that she was coming, but my mother caved the day before my aunt arrived so I wasn't surprised, but the moment I laid eyes on her, the tears started pouring. I've been told that the surgeries have left me more emotional that I used to be. Extreme emotion of any kind brings tears to my eyes. So pretty much I cry at everything. Anything that deals with cancer on TV always makes me cry.
My aunt stayed for about a month. I was able to leave the house more, since she would drive the both of us. Thankfully, I'm good at directions so we never got lost. I also ate a lot more, because my aunt is a big girl and likes good food, but I didn't really gain much weight even though I was eating a lot more. Then the day came when she left and went back home. I was back to living on my own again.
Getting a little taste of the small freedom I would have in Puerto Rico, really fueled me to ask my doctor for the permission. I don't mind being alone, but I don't like being stuck at home with no way of getting out. I'm glad I have my dog with me, he keeps me entertained, but he's a lazy dog and mainly just goes to sleep. Being alone gives you time to think, but being 21 years old, there's not that much to think about. All I want to do is get this over with, finish school, and begin my life. Seeing as none of that is possible at the moment, thinking about it just makes me depress. I know in the end everything will work out, but its not the end and I'm not that good at being patient.
So I decided that I needed a vacation. Alone. I'm naturally an independent person so I wanted to do this on my own. Its been kinda hard having to be dependent lately. I don't like asking for help when I know I can do it on my own. I honestly can't wait for the day when I can be independent again, but I'm working on it. Plus, I have to admit, I wanted to go on my own mainly for the fact that every time I come to Puerto Rico with my mother, she always gets the attention. When she arrives, people who don't normally come by come to see my mother. I swear, its similar to if the prodigal son had return.
No. This time the attention will be solely on me. I need it more than she does.
I told her from the beginning that I was going alone. She tried to fight and laughed a bit at my reasoning, but in the end she agreed. I wanted to see my grandmother and my brother, she could see them another time.
I had already received the OK from my doctor to go on my trip. I had a tooth that was giving me trouble that he required me to get rid off before leaving. I took care of it quit. Nothing was going to hold me back. I bought my tickets and told my aunt of my imminent arrival. We had decided to not tell anyone that I was coming. This time the surprise will work.
I thought it would be a little scary being on my own again, but I loved it. My mom wheeled all the way to the gate. I had received a wheelchair, since its quite a walk from the ticketing center and the gate. Security is pretty tough at the airport, so my mother was given a guest pass in order to wheel me to my gate. This obviously placated my mom, she didn't want to let me go just yet.
Wheelchairs are the first to board, but the last to get off. I personally don't mind so much. The rush to get on and off the plane is something I don't mind avoiding. The flight to PR went well actually, barely had any turbulence. I easily get cold, so I bought the combo of a blanket and pillow. I didn't realize how weak I was until I started struggling with the package trying to open it. The man next to me was kind enough to help. Probably because he didn't want to see my struggle anymore.
We've arrived!
I was escorted in a wheelchair all the way to the luggage pick up area and then my aunt picked me up from there. I was excited. Two weeks of not having to call or go to the hospital. My vacation had started.
Everyone was extremely surprised. My grandmother stood in shock when she first laid eyes on me. She didn't even know how to hug me. I swear she would have had a heart attack, if she hadn't taken her pills. My grandmother's house is sort of a hub where a lot of my family meet. As soon as they started pouring in, I was asked the same question all the time: "What are you doing here?" and of course, "Where's your mom?" Even my brother asked the same questions when he saw me, but his question was more along the vein of being a protective big brother. He just wanted to know how I traveled on my own. He thinks I'm made of glass; little sister problems.
Bad thing about surprise visits, no one makes plans to show you around. Normally, family always drives you around to show you things that have changed and the staples that you must visit. Since no one knew, I didn't get the usual tour. The first week, I didn't really travel or visit anywhere. It wasn't until the second week that I did anything. Even then, I didn't really go anywhere. I went mainly to stores, the ones that either have different things than their American counterparts or didn't exist in America at all. I did go to Pinones, a city on the coast of the sea, that sells the best alcapurrias.
Also went to a birthday party in a place called Alberque Olimpico. Its a facility for water athletes to stay and train for the Olympics and other events. The place has three areas, one of which is a small water park where visitors can go. It's nothing like Wet n' Wild, but it has three adult slides, an area for the kids, and a wave pool. I really wanted to try going down the slides, but the rain had began to fall and didn't stop until a hour before the park closed. The drive to this place was beautiful. Puerto Rico has a lot of mountains.
I tried to get pictures of the houses built along the mountains, but I was always in a bad angle.
I also went to a timeshare like place of my cousin's friend's parents. They had invited her to chill at the place. The timeshare had a pool and was walking distance from the beach, The beach was literally in its backyard. We mostly spent our time in the pool, mainly for the fact that her eldest daughter doesn't really like going into the beach. Or water for that fact. She likes to stay on the edge, but never really go in. I was ok with that. One, I live in Florida, beaches aren't hard to find, and two, I don't like beaches that much either. Too salty.
My last day before I was to leave, was spent with one of my aunts. We went to San Juan, which always feels like I'm entering an older era. I didn't get many pictures, because it was raining. Which sucked, but also was a blessing. Typically we walk around Viejo San Juan, but the rain prevented that and I was ok with that. I don't like nor physically can walk long distances, so I avoid them if I can. We really wanted some churros though, but the carts were all closed.
All in all, I had a good trip. I did what I mainly wanted to do, which was to see my family. I even went to Loiza, where my Dad's side of the family lives. Its not too far from the city where my mom comes from. Then again, nothing in Puerto Rico is too far from another. I takes four hours to drive from Kissimmee to Tallahassee. Driving four hours non-stop in Puerto Rico is pretty much the whole outer island. You can visit all of Puerto Rico in a day. It's a small island. Very small. Sometimes you can barely see it on a map sometimes.
I plan to come back with my mother for Thanksgiving. My great grandfather is 98 years old with alzheimer and is not doing too well. My mother would like to see him one more time, before his time is up.
I got my much needed break and now it was time to return. Return to the hospitals, doctors, nurses, and chemo. The one thing that sucked during my vacation was the fact that the day after I arrive back in Orlando, I will have chemo. The one where I have to stay overnight in the hospital.
By the way, by the time I finished writing this, it stopped raining.
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